Ethan Pang

Over the weekend, I was at one of the large chain supermarkets and queuing up in a long line to check out. I was the 5^th person in the line with another 3 persons behind me. There were 5 cashier counters open with every one of them with long lines of customers with carts of purchases.

Even though the supermarket was visibly crowded and the customers waiting in line were getting impatient by the minute, the cashier serving my line did not seem to think that she could help the situation. Sure, her pace of scanning the customer purchases picked up, but her displeasure of her having to work so hard showed on her face and every part of her body language. Her shoulders were slouched and she stood with a never-care-less stance. There was no “Hello, how are you?” and there was no “Thank you, bye bye.” There was no smile and no eye-contact. In fact, there was a constant frown on her face. And when the barcode scanner could not read a product label, she would make snickering noises coupled with sighs. She drummed her fingers on the cash register while waiting for the EPS transaction to come through. Although she didn’t utter a sound, her entire physiology said, “Why do all of you have to all come at the same time and make life difficult for me??”

I glanced over to the cashier counter next to mine and what I saw made me want to switch lane even though that meant having to get the end of the queue. This other cashier was beaming with a smile, greeting every customer and chatting up a small conversation while waiting for the credit card machine to proceed payments, she looked at children in their strollers and teased them. When she couldn’t get the price of an item right, she will tell the customer that she needed to run off quickly to the product shelf to check the price and did so swiftly. She handed back the change and receipt with both hands, looked the customer in the eyes, and said, “Thank you. See you again!”

Question: When there is an opportunity to be promoted, which cashier do you think will get it?

I know that being a cashier doesn’t earn a high salary. In fact, I do not think salary is the problem here. In any job, whether high paying or not, you will find people with poor attitude and people with excellent attitude. I call the people with poor attitude, the ducks, and people with excellent attitude, the eagles.

You can spot ducks and eagles easily around you. Ducks always have excuses for the circumstances that they are in (and often put blame on them), refuse to do more than they are “supposed to” or told to. Eagles, on the other hand, will always find a way to soar above their circumstances. They accept responsibility for their own circumstances, find solutions to problems, and go the extra mile to get their job done in an excellent fashion.

You will always find that success follows eagles wherever they are and wherever they go.

Whenever I talk about goal-setting and finding our dream, I get many people asking me this same question, “How do I find my dream and set my goals?”While there are many ways to arrive at this answer, I have found one technique simple and easy but it may introduce some unease amongst some people. Nevertheless, it is an effective one. Bestselling author, Dr. Steven R. Covey, in his book “Seven habits of highly effective people” called this technique “starting with the end in mind.”

Imagine you were dead and lying in the coffin at your own funeral sometime in the future.

How many people would attend your funeral to say goodbye?

Who would they be?

What would they be saying about you?

Do you think, during such a time, you’d be interested to hear people talking about your job title, how much money you had, how many cars or houses you owned, or how many companies you ran?

If you had lived a life with purpose and one that is fulfilled, you would most likely have many people who would mourn your departure. Amongst these people would be your loved ones, family, relatives and those you have touched, influenced, and impacted. Would they feel a great sense of loss and speak of how your life had made a difference in theirs? Would they talk about how you have contributed to the community?

Let me encourage you to take a moment to think about what it is you’d like people to say about you at your own funeral; what would you like to be known for and remembered by.

What you come up with will give you a good idea what your goals and dreams for your life would be. You see, the answers to these questions will be a good reflection of how you have lived your life.

You have heard me saying this often, “In the long run, we are all dead. What matters is what we are going to do with our lives between now and then.” Deep down in our hearts, we all crave purpose and significance.

Make your life count!

We all know that it is food that supplies energy and nutrients to the body. While food is the source of energy for our body, it is interesting to note that the process of digestion, which converts food into energy, is in itself one of the most energy consuming processes in the body.

Ever noticed how tired and sleepy you feel after eating a rich, heavy meal? That’s because the digestion process uses a lot of energy. How about waking up in the morning feeling as though you have not slept much? Just look at what you ate for dinner (or supper) the previous night and you’ll know why.

If you improve the digestion process, you will be able to lead a more active, energetic lifestyle. Here are some tips to do so:

• Drink a large glass of water (16 fluid oz if possible) early in the morning when you wake up to flush your system. The water should be at normal room temperature and not chilled. You could squeeze some lemon into the water.  Not many people know this but lemon is alkaline and thus balances off the acid in the stomach accumulated overnight.
• Contrary to popular dietary teachings which advise you to eat a heavy breakfast, a regular lunch, and a light dinner, I’d suggest that you eat a light breakfast made up of green juices and salads. This will keep your system alkaline for better efficiency. And, of course, never eat a huge meal as your dinner.
• Eat 6 small meals throughout each day instead of 3 larger meals. This will spread out your calorie intake as well as ease your digestive system.
• Minimize mixing both proteins and carbohydrates in each meal. This means that you should eat meats, seafood, etc. separately from rice, noodles, pasta, etc. and with fresh vegetables. For example, pasta with salad, or fish with salad. The digestion of proteins and carbohydrates require different enzymes and acidity level in the system. Eating both at the same time causes the entire digestion process to become very overworked and inefficient.
• Eat lots of raw (i.e. not cooked or at least don’t overcook) vegetables each meal. This helps retain the nutrients and vitamins. The proportion of vegetables should be at least 50% of the meal.
• High sugar content causes acidity. This is why eating too much sweets will result in tooth decay. This is because the acid burnt through the enamel of the teeth and made them vulnerable to decay.
• Coffee is highly acidic and the caffeine it contains is, literally, poison to your body. Many people become very alert and active after drinking coffee because your body is working overtime to try to get rid of the caffeine. The same goes for any form of alcohol. And, by the way, alcohol kills brain cells and brain cells do not regenerate.

Simple stuff but they can go a looooong way!

Have you been on a boat?

If you have stood at the rear end of the boat and looked back, you would see the waves (which are called the “wake”) created by the boat when it is moving forward. Unless you are taking the boat for leisure (like a cruise to nowhere), the boat would be heading to a destination of your choice. Just like taking a plane, you usually will not board a plane not knowing where you are going.

Here’s a question for you: What is giving the boat energy and momentum and moving it towards its destination? 

Let me shortlist the possible answers for you: Is it the waves caused by the movement of boat or is it the motor on the boat?

The answer is obvious. You may even say, “Ethan, that’s a silly question to ask. Of course, it is the motor that is driving the boat!! How can the waves drive the boat?!”

Indeed! The same answer applies to our lives, yet it is not so obvious to most of us.  We often think that it is the waves in our lives that caused us to choose something, go somewhere, or do something. You see, the waves are but side-effects of the boat moving forward towards its destination. The waves are but the trail that the boat leaves behind.

The waves, or “wake” if you like, do not propel the boat at all. What propels the boat is the motor or the engine onboard. For people who mistakenly think that it is “the waves” in their lives that move them forward, they’ll focus their energy on making the waves better, bigger, and nicer. After some time (for some, never), they’ll realise that they should have focused their energies on making the motor better instead because a better, stronger motor will move them further, faster towards their destination!

As we move through life towards our goals and vision, we should always remember that it should be our dream (or passion, vision, mission, purpose, calling, whichever you wish to call it) that drives us. Our dream is our motor. As we make choices and take actions to move towards our dream, we will create “waves” around us. Such waves may be how people think of us, the results that we get, the effects of our decisions, etc. But they are the waves and not the motor.

So, focus on your motor and your own life direction. Build a bigger motor, equip your motor with better accessories and supply it with good fuel and you will reach your destination faster than you think!